When the Master governs,
the people are hardly aware that he exists.
Next best is a leader who is loved.
Next, one who is feared.
The worst is one who is despised!
If you don’t trust the people,
You make them untrustworthy.
The Master doesn’t talk, he acts.
When his work is done,
The people say “Amazing: we did it, all by ourselves”
When you don’t trust people, you make them untrustworthy. And really, you don’t have any control over what happens, so just treat everyone with love. What they do is what they will do. I have no control over that.
Replace the word leader with parent. My kids do not fear me. They do not despise me. When I am gone I have no worries that they are doing to turn into wild humans because their “Master” isn’t there watching them and making sure they are doing the right thing.
I think many parents find this hard to do because they want or feel they need to be in control. Or that it is easier if they are the ones in control and making all the decisions. Many find it hard to not be the authority figure when it comes to our children.
If you always make the decisions for your kids and never let them make their own, then when they do make a decision, both you and your child may question it.
Right now Stuart is in college and he is making all of his decisions. I have to stop myself from wanting to go through the process of picking next years classes with him. I have to trust that he will pick the classes that are right for him. Even if I question his choices, would have chosen something different or think his choices are “wrong” – I must step back, trust Stuart and end the end it will be wonderful.
There is a lot that could be said about the way government treats us. I always felt there was too many rules in government that people should be trusted to do the right thing. For example a couple of years ago they passed a seatbelt law. You must wear a seatbelt. Of course I ware my seatbelt because it will keep me safe in an accident. I wear it because it is the right thing to do, not because of some law or some ruler telling me that I must wear it or I will be fined $100.
I understand that the art of governing doesn’t just refer to governing others, it also includes governing your self. The art of self-government is the art of living with accordance with the way of nature and the way of peace. I will show love to myself.